Gottman Method Couple Therapy, developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, is a popular approach to couples counseling that focuses on strengthening relationships through effective communication, conflict resolution, and fostering a deeper understanding and appreciation between partners. This method is grounded in research from the Gottman's extensive study over several decades.

Currently, our therapists who provide Gottman Method Couple Therapy are Stacey Lee Henderson, Lim Swee Chen, Anne Ueberbach, & Ho Shee Wai.

Gottman Couple Therapy

  • This is the foundation of Gottman therapy. It consists of nine components:
    -trust
    -commitment
    -building love maps
    -sharing fondness and admiration
    -turning towards instead of away
    -the positive perspective
    -managing conflict
    -making life dreams come true
    -creating shared meaning.

  • Gottman Therapy identifies four negative communication styles that predict relationship failure: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Gottman Therapy works to recognize and replace these behaviors with healthier communication patterns.

  • The approach emphasizes the importance of building a strong emotional connection and enhancing friendship. This involves knowing each other's likes, dislikes, fears, hopes, and dreams (referred to as “Love Maps”).

  • Gottman Therapy does not aim to eliminate conflict but teaches couples how to manage conflict constructively. This includes learning how to have respectful, calm discussions, even during disagreements.

  • The method encourages couples to increase positive interactions and experiences in their relationship. This is based on the idea that a higher ratio of positive to negative interactions in a relationship (ideally 5:1) is a strong predictor of lasting relationships.

Key Principles of Gottman Therapy