Helping a Friend or Family Member with Eating Disorder

Seeing our friend or family member going through their struggle with eating disorder is not easy.  Many of us feel helpless and lost in terms of how we can be of support and help to them.  Find out some do's, don'ts, and preventive tips for eating disorder.

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General Dos & Don'ts
Do:

• Learn about eating disorders so you will recognize the signs when you see them.
• Understand the consequences of eating disorders on physical and psychological health. Eating disorders are potentially fatal diseases and must be treated accordingly.
• Listen to the individual with understanding, respect, and sensitivity.
• Tell the person you are concerned, you care, and you would like to help. Suggest that the person seek professional help from a physician and/or therapist.
• Be available when your friend or family member needs someone with whom to talk.
• Discuss things other than food, weight, counting calories, and exercise. Attempt to talk about feelings instead.
• Share your own vulnerabilities and struggles in coping with life.

 
Don't:

• Don't take any action alone. Get help.
• Don't try to solve the problem for her. She needs a qualified professional.
• Don't blame her for doing something wrong or tell her she is acting silly.
• Don't gossip about her.
• Don't focus on weight, the number of calories being consumed, or particular eating habits.
• Don't make comments about her appearance. Concern about weight loss may be interpreted as a compliment, and comments about weight gain may be seen as criticism.
• Don't be afraid to upset her; talk with her.
• Don't reject or ignore her; she needs you.
• Don't get involved in a power struggle around eating or other symptoms.
• Don't be deceived by her excuses.

 
Prevention Tips for Parents
Do:

• Examine your own beliefs and feelings about body image and weight and consider how these might be communicated to your children in your attitudes, comments, or nonverbal responses.
• Encourage healthy eating and exercise.
• Allow your child to determine when he/she is full.
• Talk about different body types and how they can all be accepted and appreciated.
• Discuss the dangers of dieting.
• Show your children you love them for who they are inside, not because of how they look.

 
Don't:

• Don't label foods as "good" or "bad."
• Don't use food as a reward or punishment.
• Don't diet or encourage your child to diet.
• Don't comment on weight or body types: yours, your child's, or anyone else's.
• Don't let anyone ridicule, blame, or tease your child.